Monday, December 27, 2010

I want man boobs!

What?! Just wait and I'll explain.

When a man gains weight he typically gets a belly and "man boobs", right? Well, I've been putting on a little weight, and it's not that the number bothers me, it's they way it's "settling." I'm having trouble getting my pants on and some of my shirts are a little tighter then I like them in the belly area. BUT, my bra still fits great. Why can't I get wo-man boobs? 

I'm not a big girl and was blessed with not big breasticles. That's pretty much been okay with me. Nothing a padded bra won't take care of. OH WAIT! I lied. There was this one time for just a minute that it REALLY bothered me.

You see I have 4 children and 3 of them were born in a 33 month span. After I was done breastfeeding the last one the boobs went back to normal. I guess I should say normal size. They most certainly did not go back to normal! It was the first time in my life I really felt like I was lacking. I think it was because while I was pregnant and/or breastfeeding for almost 4 years I had ta tas! I got used to it. I missed them!

And here is where spilling all your dirty little secrets in your blog begins...

I actually went and had a consultation to buy some. I have friends who have done it. I don't see anything wrong with it. I was SERIOUSLY considering it. I got all the info, went and got measured, tried some on for size. The works. I was just to call back and schedule the procedure. The craziest thing happened after my consultation tho. I decided I was fine with my itty bitties. After all my research and such I decided it wasn't for me.

So anywho. Now I'm gaining weight. I know this is typical for a lot of people for the holidays, but not me. Maybe it's because I'm not in my 20s anymore. Maybe it's because I have a desk job now and don't spend all day chasing babies. Whatever the reason, it's happening! I just wish I could decide where it goes. Instead of the butt/belly/midsection region I wish it would go to my chest, or my chickeny calves, or maybe even just a touch on the arms.

I'm going to call this my first "shocker blog". It may be a little TMI for some, but that's what's been on my mind today. ALL day! It's just not fair. I want man boobs!

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